Hi I'm Alana

french:

I’m so fucking weird
It’s like:
I’m the nicest rude person you’ll ever meet.
I don’t give a fuck about anything but at the same time, I care about a lot.
I hate people but I want to be everyone’s friend.
I hate myself but I’m completely fabulous.
I need help.


Eleventh doctor: I will not forget one line of this, not one day, I swear. I will always remember when The Doctor was me.
Twelfth Doctor: WHO THE FUCK ARE YOU? WHO THE FUCK AM I? I CAN'T REMEMBER A DAMN THING

tinadayton:

I would just like to say fuck you to everyone who made me feel inadequate growing up and ruining my self esteem for years. You all suck and I’m glad I don’t talk to any of you any more. 

sherlography:

So I was watching Sherlock and I decided to pause it so I could read the newspaper article in the title sequence and I just

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The salacious truth about their home life.

As in,
salacious [səˈleɪʃəs]

adj
1. having an excessive interest in sex
2. lustful; bawdy.

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goodbyefriendsiamgoneforever:

just a friendly reminder that there are people out there who’ve had sex with your favourite celebrity and you’re not one of them

yeigar:

YOU KNOW WHATS HORRIBLE, WHEN YOU HAVE A CRUSH. NOT A FUCKING “OOH ID PUT MY CHIP IN THEIR DIP” BUT A FUCKING CRUSH THATS SO STRONG THAT YOU CAN IMAGINE THEM HUGGING YOU FROM BEHIND, AND PUTTING THEIR FACE TO YOUR BACK OR NECK.  THEIR LITTLE SLEEP SOUNDS AND THEIR DISGUSTING MORNING BREATH THAT YOU DON’T MIND BECAUSE YOUR CRUSH IS THAT FUCKING STRONG

mountainashes:

trying to make time-sensitive plans with someone who doesn’t text back quickly

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princeofkawaii:

middleshiner:

why are men always spitting all over the sidewalk? do men create more saliva than women and need to get rid of it? are they marking their territory? what’s going on?

They can’t swallow because that’s gay

fartgallery:

secondstartotherightamirite:

fartgallery:

boo backwards is oob which is just one letter away from boob

boo is one letter from boob too tho

life is just full of miracles

sindohan:

people who say ”romantic love is what makes you human!!!!” are actually right. aromantic people are, in fact, gods in disguise, traveling in the human world to observe and study the humans and their weakpoints, in order to eventually eliminate them all and take over their world